The Six Types Of Friends You Need In Business

By Bill Ringle

Psychologist Linda Santoro was interviewed on television recently on the topic of the six types of friendships psychologists say each of us needs in our life to happy.

She elaborated on the best friend, the fun friend, the wise friend, the community friend, the mentor friend, and the opposite gender friend.

It got me thinking of the different types of friendships each of us needs in business to be successful – whether you're running your own business or contributing to the success of a company.

Lo and behold, I came up with my own six types!

Based on my experience of managing complex technical projects as well as working one-on-one with executives as a business coach, here are the six different types of friendships that each of us benefits from seeking, developing, and enjoying.

1. A friend who is marketing smart -- someone who helps you understand the implications of your actions and encourages you to be visible at the right times and in the right ways. When my friend Fred told me to spend 20% of my time promoting the success of my projects inside a Fortune 100 company where we both worked, I thought he was nuts. "What could possibly be gained? What would I say? Who should I be talking to about this?" are all questions that sprang to mind. But I did it anyway, figured out the steps, and it led not only to higher recognition for the work of my project team and division, but others in the company volunteered to help in ways I didn't expect or imagine. As an entrepreneur, it's critical to spend at least a day a week devoted to networking, PR, and staying in touch with my clients.

2. A friend who is politically smart -- someone who understands what battles to fight, and how to fight to win when something really matters. My friend Charley taught me a valuable lesson in this regard many years ago when he was explaining how he got into a posh tennis club so quickly. "I asked around and found out who I needed to beat to get their attention and who I needed to lose against to get their
support." This kind of friend also understands what motivates the people who can help your career and buy from your business.

3. A friend who is technically smart - someone who can help demystify the jargon without leaving out important details. Technology is a big and ever-changing environment; no matter how much you know in this field, you couldn't go wrong having friends with different areas of specialty. I have different friends who I talk to when I have a large scale information system design issue compared to getting an opinion on how to optimize a snazzy Flash animation -- different experts for different areas of expertise. I've also learned to make new friends quickly while working on projects; doing so has saved valuable time. Some people may know several technical areas very well and that adds value to their perspective.

4. A friend who is business smart - someone who cannot only grasp the connections within and between departmental functions, how to structure a offer or negotiate a deal, but how to see the hidden potentials of your assets. I have been so fortunate to learn from business people who are so good at this; it's inspiring. One of the first times I sat with someone like this, I was amazed. I was invited to participate in a meeting as a consultant to a project, and one of the other business managers was a man named Harland. Harland's multidimensional mind could see combinations and opportunities for working together that were astounding. We got several days worth of work done in an afternoon as a result of his insights and participation, and raised the quality of our deliverables, as well.

5. A friend who is financially smart -- someone who has two very important qualities fits in this category. First, this person is someone who is competent with financial matters, not just someone who "knows a thing or two" about tracking stocks or balancing a checkbook. Professional experience and training count for a lot, though in some cases, having a level or two greater expertise with a financial tool (whether EDS or QuickBooks, depending on your circumstances), could be just the thing you need. The second important quality needed to be a financial friend is that you trust this person. Sure you could hire an accountant, a certified professional. There's a time and a place for that, and I certainly advocate that everyone in business have a good accountant to turn to. A financial friend could be your accountant, but it could also be the friend you play doubles with who you can talk to after the match and get an objective and informed opinion.

6. A friend who is a mentor or coach - either formally or informally, someone who knows your challenges, knows your goals, and holds out the perspective and possibility of you succeeding in your chosen endeavors. You may find it helpful to think back to a teacher who was particularly interested in seeing you reach a goal, or a sports coach who believed in you and provided the techniques and encouragement to succeed. It might be a manager or supervisor at work who takes the long view of the business and knows the benefits of nurturing the next level of leadership. In my first job after college, I was a computer director at a New England boarding school. I was well-qualified technically for the position, but if it weren't for my friend Terry, I would have been battling the unwritten rules of the organization that are rarely covered in any orientation. Terry helped me understand what committees to volunteer for, what deadlines
and social functions to pay particular attention to, and in general, helped me navigate the choppy waters of a new work culture.

Jot down the names of the people who come to mind in each of these categories. In what area or areas do you find it easiest to make friends? Are these areas ones that are most similar to your area of strength? In other words, the engineers find it easiest to make technical friends, the marketing types gravitating toward other marketing types, and so on. What are the areas that you have found the most challenging in making friends?

It's never too late to reach out to someone new!

Now, after you've identified the friends that you need in order to be successful, spend a few moments thinking about the people you know who would put you on THEIR list. What kind of friend are you? How have you helped your friends succeed? What can you do to become an even better friend to those who count on you?

Bill Ringle, President, Star Communications Group, is America's Internet Business Coach. He advises corporate executives who want to make better decisions about technology and small business owners who want to use the Internet to grow their business.  Clients include MetLife, DuPont, Apple Computer, Pitney Bowes, Women in Communications, DaraTech, PRODN, CAMA, the National Speakers Association, University of Pennsylvania, Drexel University.  He is the author of TechEdge, Using Computers to Present and Persuade. Copyright© 2000-2001, Bill Ringle.   All rights reserved. To contact Bill about his availability to speak to your group, please call the Frog Pond at 800-704-FROG (3764) or email susie@frogpond.com;  http://www.frogpond.com.